I’ve got a thousand words that I never spoke
see I broke down codes at an early age
filled the page, filled my ears with rage
sound in my headphones sound like a cyclone
I’m accustomed to failure. I’m comfortable with it and it actually doesn’t humiliate me or crush me. A lifetime of dashed dreams and unmet expectations have taught me not to sweat defeat, but to revise your goals instead. So this, the second day of NaNoWriMo, has showed me that I am not:
a.psychologically capable or prepared to write a novel at this point
b.certain I ever want to write a novel
c.really concerned about that fact one way or another
I love to write. I always have. Me and 50 million of my closest friends. I like to write here with a heavy slant toward ironic urban speak, pop culture references and YouTube videos. I like to write at the Argus, which still allows my flava, but cleaned up nice for civilized folk. I like to write for Trifecta, for the Band, for Becky‘s frugal living blog, for anyone who will let me.
But I’m not so big on the fiction. I enjoy consuming it, but creating it…not so much. The one exception would be description. I love to find new ways to define something, to illustrate a single word or emotion with other words. Description is a beautiful thing and it lends a lot to the atmosphere of a piece of writing, but it’s only one layer. Novels are like onions. They make everything taste better and have many layers.
So I’ve revised my goal. I plan to write 50,00 words this month. No blog words to be used in this experiment. 50,000 words of fiction, essays, autobiographical material or otherwise toward the goal of finding my true voice. The one I want to focus my writing on. And toward the goal of writing for love every day because I can, because I want to and because the NaNo police are only in my mind.
Probably.
Dawnie
November 2, 2012 at 8:45 pm
YOU CAN DOOOO IT! And no matter what you get done, we’ll celebrate it. Whether it’s 50,000 words of brilliance, or 50,000 words to help you find your voice. It’s all worth celebrating!
Lulo
November 4, 2012 at 3:18 am
Dude, you are like the BEST cheerleader. I believe I can do it after that comment.
karen
November 2, 2012 at 11:10 pm
Awesome!!!!!!
Not me though. Even though I could produce 50,000 incoherent words for a comment in one sitting. I just plan to get through the month, and get a passport application filed.
I think that’s aiming high enough.
Can’t wait to see what you come up with this month. Go grrrrrrrrrrrrllllllllll!
Lulo
November 4, 2012 at 3:17 am
Omg, that made me laugh. You could write that kind of comment. You should start a challenge for writing 50K words of comments in a month.
Amelia
November 3, 2012 at 1:56 am
You kick ass. Also I’m incapable of writing fiction. It bewilders me to think of making up stories out of thin air.
Lulo
November 4, 2012 at 3:16 am
Aw, you’re sweet. And I’m pretty sure I’m in the same boat re: fiction.
Lisa
November 3, 2012 at 8:28 am
I’ll quit if you do. Wait. That’s not motivational. WE CAN DO THIS. But, seriously, if you want to quit, I’ll totes quit with you. Because this shit is NOT easy. And we can spend the rest of the month doing more exciting things like. . .uhhhhhhhhhhh. . .http://www.emojidick.com
Lulo
November 4, 2012 at 3:15 am
Dude, we CAN do this. But let’s revisit the quitting thing on Tuesday.
Cindy
November 3, 2012 at 9:28 am
I could not write a novel either. Smart woman, revising your goals.
Lulo
November 4, 2012 at 3:13 am
I’m nothing if not adaptable.
Triplezmom
November 3, 2012 at 5:55 pm
That’s wonderful! I’m using my hurricane excuse not to even attempt this this year, but I’ll try next year.
Lulo
November 4, 2012 at 3:12 am
Dude, that is a great fucking excuse. Stay safe and dry.
Melinda
November 4, 2012 at 12:52 am
I signed up for NaNoWriMo once, but never did it. I think I’d have to have an idea of what I’d like to write first!
I am doing NaBloPoMo (over at doesthisscalemakemelookfat.blogspot.com), which is pretty much all I can commit to!
Lulo
November 4, 2012 at 3:11 am
Hey, that’s a big commitment with everything you have on your plate. You can do it!
Top Ten Questions About Books I’m Not Writing « « LucidLotusLife LucidLotusLife
November 4, 2012 at 2:58 am
[...] in some challenge to answer ten questions about my novel. For those of you playing along at home, I’m not writing a novel. Because I believe that leaving a game of tag before tagging someone else is bad form, and [...]
Tracie
November 4, 2012 at 7:27 pm
NaNo scares me. But I love how you are taking the challenge and making it fit into your life and writing. That is brilliant.
You can do this!