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Spring in Ptown = the 9th circle of hell. Or is it the 7th? I never can keep them straight. Gray skies and rain and migraines, oh my. Somebody get me on a Greyhound outta here. Maybe down the Hudson River line. Maybe down the road to Hana. But I’ll even take Cincinnati, if the sun is shining there.
I’ve been promised sunshine this week and if I don’t get it somebody’s gonna pay. Most likely my husband who has the misfortune of being married to a sufferer of the lack of sun related DT’s.
In lieu of the ‘shine, I turn the volume to eleven and shake it like a Polaroid picture.
This is the kind of day(life?) it is, y’all. A gray and rainy because, hello, Portland. A day when communication seems fucked by the stars. Poor Mercury, no one gives you the time of day until you go all retrograde. A day when that pain in your left arm takes up all the space in yer brainpan until you realize that you worked out yesterday. A day when you are of a “certain age”(read: old as fuck) when left arm pains are of legitimate concern. A day when the words fierce and ferosh need to be pulled out of the Closet of Lame to force your tired bones to RALLY.
They may be neither fierce nor ferosh, but they are fanfuckingfun and it’s hard to be all Grumpy Cat when you’re dancing around in your underwear singing about what you really, really want. All you music purists can SUCK IT. Sometimes you just really need to zigazigAH. And,as I learned last night from attending the bestie’s 32nd anniversary of her 10th bday, friendship really never does end.
Today’s Dance Interlude is brought to you courtesy of Dawnie‘s Trifecta entry. Holding it down, keeping it real ’92 stylo. Because I couldn’t narrow down the awesome and because I’m one half of the Game of Thirds, you get three for the price of one. Get up and get down, y’all.
2012 was a hell of a year. And by that I mean a year of hell. Depression ran rampant throughout the ranks, violence escalated, ugliness abounded. But among all that were moments of inspiration, kindnesses of every size and shape and a banding back together on a national level.
Personally, it was another year in flux, another year of being gripped by the gray. There were far less posts written and far more goals made and revised on repeat. But I’m still here. And I still want to be. Which is the only real reason to keep on keeping on.
So, thanks for the comments, the support the love. Thanks for being a witness to my little life and let me do the same in return.
Happy anni, triple L. And happy New Year to all y’all. May all of your dreams be big and may you never stop dreaming them. And may you dance your balls off more days than not.
Becks over at Mommy Wants Vodka hosts her annual meme about this time every year and I am jumping aboard this crazy train for the second time because I like random surveys given by foxy bitches who like encased meats. This is what I had to say last year, if’n you care to refresh.
1. What did you do in 2012 that you’d never done before?
I made science my bitch.
2. Did you keep your New Year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I’m gonna say yes because I’m too lazy to look at my resolution post from last year and because I’ve been told that I need to believe in myself more. I will make more. I will make many. #onedayimgonna
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
My lovely step sister just had her first kid. Several Bandmates had babies and one of my mommy friends had her second kid.
4. Did anyone close to you die?
My favorite aunt died. There’s a hole there to deep to mention in polite company. One of my Bandmates, the irrepressible ball of joy Mrs. One Day, died this week. Although I didn’t know her well, her kindness was legend. She will be remembered, as will her message of dreaming big and dreaming often. #onedayimgonna.
5. What would you like to have in 2013 that you lacked in 2012?
Daryl Dixon and the ability to freeze time.
6. What countries did you visit?
7. What date from 2012 will remain etched upon your memory, and why:
Halloween was pretty memorable. Hulk and Thor do Urgent Care tends to stick to the gray matter.
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Showering more days than not.
9. What was your biggest failure?
There were many. The most recent went undetected to my epic relief.
I’d wear this everyday, but then I’d have to shower more.
12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Ellen, because she is spreading the kindness movement on a global level. Also, she’s fucking funny. And a cover girl.
13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
There was a lot of unkindness and bullying that made me sad in the heart parts. There was also the whole election dealio that left me exhausted and deflated. And, of course, the escalating incidences of violence that decimated me.
I’m trying to keep the light on the good stuff I witnessed. The kindness, the camaraderie, #26acts, all that Ellen does everyday for people. The Band, the Bloggess, Moosh in Indy and everyone else who shines lights into the dark corners and lifts up those who are down. Kindness is catching. Pass it on.
14. Where did most of your money go?
Christmas lights. It’s like the Griswold’s up in this bitch.
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Comic book movies. It was kinda a big year for the geeks.
16. What song will always remind you of 2012?
We really are you know.
17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder? I can hardly remember yesterday, how am I supposed to remember last year? This year has been pretty bad so probs sadder.
ii. thinner or fatter? Thinner. Slightly.
iii. richer or poorer? Same, same.
18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Flash mobs. Also flashing.
19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Second guessing and stressing.
20. How will you be spending Christmas?
I spent it with the kid and the hubberband.
22. Did you fall in love in 2012?
Only with Daryl Dixon and Russell Stover Dark Chocolate and Coconut Cream Santas.
23. How many one-night stands?
I’ve had a series of them with the aforementioned Santas.
24. What was your favorite TV program?
The Walking Dead.
25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
I don’t hate anyone. But I harbor strong feelings of anger, disappointment and revulsion for a select few.
Over at Band Back Together we’re feeling like we want to junk punch the next person who asks us if we have a case of the Mondays. So instead of doing the time in the resulting anger management program, we decided to take Monday back. So we’re linking up our Dose of Happy posts and bringing the awesome back to Mondays.
Sunday night was an empty void without a new Walking Dead epi. What can I say? I like zombies. I liked them before they were blowing up the screen, both big and small, and I will like them when I’m senile and decrepit in my rocking chair (read: next Tuesday) (C U then). I also like Daryl Dixon. Because I have a male oriented vagina. I also, also like flash mobs that combine fads and include zombies.
So I have to find my happy place without TWD. Thanks be to the sweet lady internet for YouTube and the zombie craze. This may have been more relevant a few weeks ago, but my terrible timing may have given some enough time to recover the vitriol associated with every single election ever and bring the focus back around to where it should be – the zombie apocalypse, aka the new American Dream.
I’m saving that for tomorrow. I am currently in the procrastinate all the things stage.
What kind of computer do you have?
Orange. Is that a kind? It’s a PC of some sort.
Are there always other fish in the sea?
Sure. Also this.
And this guy.
What can you do with your tongue?
Form the words up yours as I flip you the double bird.
Can you say all 50 states in alphabetical order?
I may or may not be able to name all 50 states if given an hour and the internet, but why would I want to? I do know there are fifty altogether, but really only five that count.
Do you have atleast 2 windows in your bedroom?
We have one window that is covered in various forms of light blocking coverage. We like the light in our room blinking and coming from technology.
Last time you babysat?
I want nothing to do with other people’s children right now. But I will hold any sleeping baby for an unlimited amount of time.
Do you plan your outfits out the day before?
Yes. I have a sleeping disorder that makes me unable to go to bed before 1 am or wake the fuck up in the morning and I have a kid. Anything that will give me an extra 12 1/2 seconds in Snoozetown USA.
Favorite Pro Sports team?
Sports blow. I like the Cubs because I always have, because Wrigley Field feels like America to me and because they always lose. You know, lovable.
What is the last thing you bought?
Meat. I got takeout BBQ for the boys.
How many peircings do you have?
Multiple ear piercings, but I rarely even fill the first holes. Not much for the jewelry.
Can you touch your toes?
I’m going to go with maybe. I haven’t tried lately and I am getting pretty old and wretched.
Where in the world is carmen sandiego?
A better question would be, who in the fuck is Carmen Sandiego? Her name is kinda badass.
Favorite person to be with?
Ever been on a blind date?
No. I did go on a date with a eHarmony dude. He was nice, but it turns out I was more into the way I wrote to him than the actual him of him. My letters were amazeballs. I saved them for a long time because I loved the way I wrote.
Do you believe in God?
Yes. No. Maybe. Repeat.
One place you will NEVER eat at?
McDonald’s. I would rather eat my own vomit.
Would you date anyone you met online?
See above. That was my one experience. It wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t good either. It was much more enjoyable in the emailing phase.
Opinion of Chinese symbol tattoos?
That was the third tattoo I ever got. It was in the late 90′s in Bozeman, Montana from some guy named Gerald. It the Chinese character for transformation inside a butterfly. It’s actually cool with me if it really reads, truckers do it on the road or, try Chun King for your beautiful body. It means what it means to me. Transformation is kind of my deal. And butterflies are a family thing and represent my grandma. It’s in the middle of my back so I’m basically the originator of the tramp stamp. Which is hot. Probably.
Sexy is not the word I’d use. Although I do love me some Lorne. Now, give me an ill-tempered, bitey vampire and I’ll sing a different song.
Have you ever been white-water rafting?
When I was maybe 19, I went on a raft with my sister, mom and aunt. It was in South Bend, IN and the waterway was jacked up from some race shit that they do there. We had no clue what we were doing and the raft flipped almost immediately. I was screaming for my mom. I thought I was gonna die. The closest I’ll ever get to that again is the log ride at Disney.
Have you met a real redneck?
I lived in Texas for half of my life. Several years of that was spent in College Station. I don’t think they grow them any other way.
What was the last movie you watched?
Silver Linings Playbook. It was good. Funny, sweet. But I’m not overly fond of the whole mental illness as comedic fodder thing.
What do you usually order from Starbucks?
God, I love coffee. So I don’t drink it. Obvi. Addiction runs deep in this girl. When I first got sober, I upped the cigs to two packs a day and stopped eating everything but sugar and coffee. Although not together. I like my coffee black as sin and iced. Starbucks is a rare occurrence when the husband wants it. They have these breakfast sammies that rule though. And sometimes I’ll have a hot chocolate although I’d rather have it from the Oregon zoo. That shit is dope.
Have you ever fired a gun?
Do you like Michael Jackson?
I like his music. I have always been smitten with classic R&B and soul. The Jackson 5 were not my faves, but I did love them. And MJ had some good shit too. Thriller was pretty badass and Bad was not bad too.
MJ the dude? I feel for him. He was fucked up early on and it just continued unchecked. I feel bad for the kids I believe he abused. I do get the feeling that he really felt like he was a kid so he probs didn’t feel it was wrong. But enough people accused him and were subsequently shut the fuck up. You gotta believe the children, yo.
I also feel bad for his kids. I’ve seen them on Ellen and they are just as awkward as he was. I hope they grow out if it, but who could be any shade of normal growing up in that kind of life. I would off myself on the second day of being trailed by the poppers.
Ever call a 1-900 phone number?
Do they still have those? The internet be free, y’all. And the filth abounds. Save your dolla bills for the club.
So, I wrote again for the Hillsboro Argus. It may or may not contain politics(it may). Enter at your own risk. Or whatever. But seriously, when we did we all get so crazy sensitivo that we need to have a warning that we might disagree or be enraged by something? All the power to be affected is in our own hands. Click away, young Tony Danza. Or(your name here).
This video rules. And right about now something needs to. xoxo